It’s easy to make quick judgements about others’ financial choices or even our own. We see someone splurging on something and think, “Why aren’t they saving that money?” Or we might be hard on ourselves for not having the perfect budget or for making a purchase that wasn’t strictly necessary. But what if, instead of judging, we approached these situations with curiosity (just as Ted states in Ted Lasso TV show).
Curiosity opens the door to understanding. When we’re curious, we ask questions like, “Why did I make that choice?” or “What’s really driving that person’s spending?” These questions lead us to deeper insights. Maybe that splurge was a way of coping with stress, or perhaps it was an investment in something that brings genuine joy and value. By being curious, we start to see the complexities behind financial decisions, and we can respond with empathy rather than criticism.
This shift from judgement to curiosity in my opinion is incredibly powerful, especially when it comes to our mental health. Judgement often leads to guilt, shame, and anxiety – feelings that can worsen our wellbeing. But curiosity is different. It encourages self-reflection without the harsh self-talk. For example, if you find yourself overspending, instead of berating yourself, ask, “What’s behind this behaviour?” Maybe you’re feeling burned out and using shopping as a way to cope. Recognising this can help you address the root cause, whether that means finding healthier ways to manage stress or seeking support.
Curiosity can also improve our financial wellbeing. When we’re curious about our finances, we’re more likely to explore different options, learn about new strategies, and stay open to advice. Rather than feeling stuck or overwhelmed, we become engaged and proactive, which can lead to better financial decisions and outcomes.
In essence, I believe adopting a curious mindset allows us to approach financial and mental wellbeing with a sense of openness and possibility. It helps us move away from unproductive judgement and towards understanding, growth, and positive change. So next time you catch yourself jumping to conclusions – about your own choices or someone else’s – pause, take a breath, and ask a question instead. You might be surprised at the answers you find.
All the best on your journey to living a financially well life!
Article by Marc Bineham – Money coach, speaker and award-winning author of The Money Sandwich